To further this understanding we will also look at some of the psychological aspects of motivation. Psychology often looks at our human nature as composed of various parts. Freud gave us the super ego, ego and id and ever since we have labled the various aspects and dimensions of the self. Many of us are familiar with Transactional Analysis and its divisions of Child, Adult and Parent. In recovery work the distinction is made between an authentic self and a relational (sometimes called false) self. In Psychosynthesis the multiplicity of self is addressed through the idea of sub-personalities, for example: the critic, the mystic, the child, and the people pleaser might all be sharing the same psychic space. In each model we can see that different aspects of our inner world may have wishes and may influence our desire to practice or live in a spiritual way. Spiritual paths have also recognized our human capacity to know the right direction and still wind up doing something differently. Paul's statement in Roman's 7:19, "For the good that that I would, I do not; but the evil which I would not, that I do." haunts many of us today. In Middle Eastern mysticism one encounters the naphsha, the self which is differentiated in various ways, and the nafs which outline various evolutionary stages of the self. The Gurdjieff work also uses the awareness of multiplicity within the self to break through barriers to spiritual insight. In the afternoon we will have a chance to examine this dimension as we explore our own relationship with motivation on the path.

1. Practice self-control and self-denial.
2. Be a sign of joy and love to others.
3. Love the dispossessed and those suffering injustice.
4. Practice common prayer three times a day.
5. Practice personal prayer.
6. Have interior silence.
7. Practice simplicity of life.
8. Practice mercy and avoid judgement.

As one can see the rules are different in some ways but cover the same ground. In part their differences may be explained by their origin. As we develop a sense of order for our own life based in the spirit, we will all notice changes in both images and concepts. This is a natural process and one that we can trust. In general one finds that a rule should give us a way to establish ourselves in relationship to that Greater Mystery of our own understanding. This may include time for reading and study, times and directions for prayer, a manner for the examination of one's conscience, perhaps periods of self-retraint or discipline, time for intentional listening to that Presence, a commitment to one's community through corporate worship and service, and a means to exercise stewardship toward the greater environment in which we live.

We did not try to devise a personal rule during this retreat, as the task requires more than a weekend of reflection.

We did try to focus on some of the tasks which are part of this process. One of these was our exercise for Friday evening. In it we thought about the spiritual quality of intention. It has a dynamic which moves us from confusion and quandry through seeking and asking to an inner geling of purpose. When the final stage of this process occurs we may feel a large release of energy; perhaps this is the `power to carry out' the higher purpose which we have discovered. At the retreat we used journaling and small group discussion to review how this had happened in our lives.

We also looked at outcomes as a way of evaluating our attempts at practice. Paschal Baute led us on Saturday morning as we looked at another way to view our spiritual journey. First we were asked to note our personal definition of spirituality. This in itself is an interesting exercise, a question worth journaling on. Paschal then gave us a summary of his current criteria for a healthy spirituality. (I have reprinted his hand-out in this newsletter.) He tried to give us ideas that might help us as we thought about our own changes and directions for practice. Some of these include an acceptance of the mysterious in our lives and a realization of the role of the shadow . He noted that religion often builds certainty but spirituality is a challenge. These are the questions that we used for journaling. 1) Is my definition of spirituality to narrow? 2) Am I satisfied with my own outcomes? 3) What initiatives or invitations are you currently refusing in your spiritual life? and 4) What do you need to do to make those decisions today?

We also watched three interesting videotapes. They were short presentations which were meant to inspire discussion. All were well done. Afternoon was open time for reflection, though some of it was used to watch Kentucy basketball. On Sunday we shared our progress and closed with prayer.

                                            A.S.

DAY OF RECOLLECTION
May 18th
Topic undecided

QUARTERLY RETREAT
June 21, 22, and 23